Date The Green Skier...It'll Be Fine -- Ski Rex Says
It wasn't so long ago that I wrote up a post about finding a dating website called skidates.com. As I'm sure you have guessed this website is based around dating in the snow sports community. No one should be surprised by this as there is a dating website dedicated to just about every hobby, area, job description, or anything else one could be specific about. So, for the goof, I signed up and wrote a quick piece about the site, which you can find by clicking here.
Now, am I going to tell you about how I found a date for the coming season, or even before the coming season, in the days of COVID-19? Not at all. In that first article, I pointed out that there aren't that many folks within my area and I'm not really a dating website person, to begin with. Honestly, though I have used them and gone out on a date or two with women from them, I'm not really all that big into it. As I said, this sign-up was for the goof and to have something to write about for Ski Rex Media.
There was a profile that I did take notice of, however. I really wished I would have had the forethought to save the profile or take a screenshot of the title because now I can't quote it or show it. But, it said something that I have caught myself thinking about on and off since I saw it, to the point where this was almost the topic of a podcast. I ended up thinking it wouldn't make for a great podcast, but I think it's just fine to write about, which is why I'm writing this and, subsequently, why you are reading this.
The title of the woman's profile said something about green skiers need not apply. I don't remember exactly how she put it, but that's the gist of it. It's not that I really have a problem with what the woman wrote, I just see a flaw in her logic. In the end, I could be 100% wrong about that, but I think I want to explore it, real quick.
Oh, and for those who are asking, "Is there a flaw in the logic or are you upset that you couldn't talk to her because you are a green skier?" It's not the latter. I'm not a green skier. Well, that might not be totally accurate. I have been out of it for a while, so I might be a green skier now. But, I'm pretty sure I could get it back quickly enough. In any case, no, I think there is a flaw there.
You see, I get what the woman was getting at. She wants to find a skiing partner (and she was a skier, not a snowboarder, according to the profile, but this all applies to either sport) that can keep up with her. I think that's something we can all understand. It's nice to have a skiing or riding partner, whether the relationship is romantic or not, that can keep up with us. But, and this is the first flaw in that logic, what if this woman, or anyone else who makes a statement like that, isn't as good as they think?
I have heard many stories over the years from people who got chatted up during a lift ride, hanging out during aprés, or even in a parking lot on their way out and that person who chatted them up made it known how good they are. Perhaps even a little arrogant, which is really the point here. Then, that ski meeting or date comes about and the person who was asked actually turns out to be better or more experienced than the person who did the asking. When it came down to it, the person who did the asking, the one who was looking for someone to keep up with them to the point they were bragging about it a little, probably should have been looking for a blue skier at the very least.
Again, I'm not saying that is what the woman in the dating profile was doing. I'm just saying that if someone talks about how good they are, it could be a red flag as to how good they really are. Which could end up with them being lonely on the mountain anyway since they can't keep up like they thought they could.
Does that make sense?
The other flaw in avoiding the green skier, or at least a skier that might not be on one's level, comes in if a ski date or two turns into a real relationship. I mean, this could be a thing if two people are just hanging out and/or casually dating, too. If a person really isn't on one's level, then you have a chance to have something different while still having something in common.
What does that mean?
It means that the two people in question already have something in common. Skiing or riding. But, if the couple is at two different levels, it could actually be a good thing. First, if the one that isn't as experienced is interested, the more experienced of the two could give tips and pointers and help that person to get to a higher level. That takes some communication and compromise and understanding, all of which are parts of the foundation of any relationship. In the end, being at two different levels might make for a better relationship.
But, what if the less experienced person isn't really interested in improving? Well, that brings us to the second plus in this scenario. Again, the two people would already have something in common, which is a good thing, but it's also good to have differences, too. Nobody, except for those who are the true personification of arrogance and narcissism, wants to date themself. What fun would that be? It wouldn't be any fun, which is why having a different level skier or rider as your date, and possibly boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife is brilliant. While having something in common, the two folks can have a difference, too, all wrapped up in one activity.
That example also comes with the bonus of getting some time apart. Again, this isn't so much for a single date scenario as it is for a scenario in which two people are seeing each other more often. Having someone who is at a different experience level means that you could get some time apart, even on the same ski trip. As it is important to have some differences to go along with what two people have in common, it's good to have some time apart, even with a person one really enjoys spending time with. Give each other a chance to miss each other. Now, this scenario also needs communication, compromise, and understanding, but we've already noted that being a good thing. It's good to be able to turn to your person and say "Babe, I'm going to hit these more difficult runs and I'll catch up with you in a bit." Case in point, I was in that relationship. I was the more experienced and better skier, so there were times I would either be off on my own or with others who happened to be on that trip and interested in more difficult terrain. It was okay for us to be apart for some time.
Of course, this whole thing assumes that one is looking for more than just someone to ski or ride with when their friends aren't available or if a person doesn't have friends that are interested in snow sports. If that's all you're looking for, then sure, be a little picky about the level of those that you end up riding with. It's likely, in that case, that you'll only ride with that person once in a while. But, if you are on a dating website looking for someone to ski and ride with, then there's a chance you'll not only be riding with them more than once but that you'll be looking for something more than just a ski date. If that's true, then you don't want to limit yourself.
In the end, saying you're interested in only diamond or double diamond skiers or riders, no matter how good a person actually is, is seriously limiting. To be honest, one never knows when they'll meet someone special. It might not be on a ski hill. In fact, it might have nothing to do with skiing or snowboarding at all, no matter how often you participate in or love either sport. To limit oneself based on another's ability could mean missing out on someone special.
Let's make it easy, here. Does anyone think that P.K. Subban can ski as well as Lindsey Vonn? Can she skate as well as he can? Okay, truth be told I don't actually know, but they are each a professional in their own sport for a reason. In any case, they are getting married no matter how good one is at the other's sport. See what I mean?
As I usually say at the end of a lot of articles, I could have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about and could be 100% wrong about the entire thing. But, this is what I think and I think it makes sense. Do you agree? You don't have to and you can call me out for being wrong. I don't mind. If I'm wrong and you show me that, then I just learned something new, which is always a good thing.
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